Wretched Writers of the World Rejoice

The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, which awards the worst opening sentence to a novel, named its 2006 prize winner on Tuesday -- retired mechanical designer, Jim Guigli.

The BLFC, awarded by the San Jose State University English Department since 1982, is named for Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, a minor Victorian novelist who penned the infamous opening line "It was a dark and stormy night."

Guigli, a California native, submitted no less than 60 opening lines in his pursuit of the award. His winning entry is as follows:

"Detective Bart Lasiter was in his office studying the light from his one small window falling on his super burrito when the door swung open to reveal a woman whose body said you've had your last burrito for a while, whose face said angels did exist, and whose eyes said she could make you dig your own grave and lick the shovel clean."